25 Genius Tips on How To Do Long Distance Relationships

This post is all about tips on how to do long distance relationships.

Can you believe that over 75% of college students have claimed to be in a long distance relationship before? (source)

With the technology available today, it is not uncommon to be in a relationship with someone who lives miles apart from you.

When you tell people you are in a long distance relationship, you will often get responses like, “With FaceTime available you won’t even feel like you are apart from each other!” Well Aunt Sally, I love the enthusiasm. But even with FaceTime, being in a long distance relationship just plain old sucks.

A long distance relationship tests your physical, mental, and (especially) emotional sides. On top of that, social media likes to point out what every couple is doing on a Friday night together while you and your significant other have to make do talking on the phone to each other.

I am in year three of my long distance relationship with one more year to go. I know first hand just how hard it truly can be being apart from your significant other. However, I also know just how special this time apart from each other can be for your relationship.

Here are 25 genius tips from people that have successfully proven how to do long distance relationships.

First, for anyone in a long distance relationship, you will be able to relate to this video on another level.

It shows the good and bad parts of being far away from your significant other and gives tips that are essential to how to do long distance relationships.

“When you learn to respect, trust and love someone from a distance, you’ll be absolutely unstoppable when you’re together.”

As shown in this video, if you don’t take the steps and time to make your relationship work, it will start to crumble. These tips in this post will ensure that your long distance relationship will be just as strong as if you were together.

1. Have a goal in mind.

It is essential that you and your significant other come up with long-term and short-term goals that you can look forward to in your relationship.

For most long distance couples, they have the long term goal of being married. They know their significant other is the one and they are willing to put up with the distance until they are able to get to that time in their lives.

However, for many couples, that goal is a long time away. Coming up with short-term goals makes it more attainable and gives you both something to look forward too.

For my boyfriend and I, we know that in two years when we are both done with college we will be back in the same city living together. Knowing that it is just two years away, makes all the hard times now seem worth it since we will be together for the rest of our lives.

2. Appreciate the time apart.

It is so easy to dread the times you are not spent together, but it is time to change that mindset and start appreciating the time you are apart.

Go out with your girlfriends or spend more time with family. Make this time about YOU.

When you and your significant other are together, chances are that you will be spending a huge amount of time with them. You will have less time to just randomly go out with friends or to go see a movie with your mom.

Changing your mindset from dreading being apart to appreciate being apart makes a world of difference.

3. Find something you can still do together.

Even though you are far away from your partner, there are still hundreds of things you can do together.

Just recently my boyfriend was telling me how he wanted to start reading devotionals in the morning. I thought this was a great idea and the perfect way to start your day in the morning.

Before he left for college, I ordered this devotional and wrote a special note on the inside cover. Just as he was leaving, I snuck it in his backpack so when he got to school he was able to find it.

I also got myself one and now we are able to talk about it every morning together.

In the past, we have also watched the same Netlflix and Amazon Prime shows together (we LOVE Suits!) and have been able to talk about those just as if we were watching them together.

4. Always text each other before you go to bed and when you get up.

Letting your significant other know that you are thinking about them when you go to bed at night and right as you wake up in the morning let them know that they are loved and cared about.

It takes less than 30 seconds and can make a big difference in their day.

5. Truly enjoy the time you do spend together.

When you’re together, you need to TRULY enjoy that time.

It’s time to turn off those phones and talk about random things without being distracted about anything else.

Believe me, this one is hard. My boyfriend and I would find ourselves checking our friends while out to eat instead of putting them away and soaking up every second together.

One of our favorite things to do is ask each other questions that will lead to great conversations.

All of our favorite questions can be found in this post: 42 Best Deep Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend. These questions are also great to do when you are not together!

6. Send surprise texts saying how much you love them.

Sending a surprise text randomly about how much you love each other is one of the best things you can get during your day.

I’m going to be honest, my boyfriend is much better at this than I am. He will send me things like, “I love you so much” and even “You’re so hot.” (he’s going to absolutely kill me when he see’s this :))).

It takes him little time to do that but it always puts a smile to my face and shows how much he cares about me.

7. Always have your next trip planned out.

It is essential to always know the next time you will be seeing each other.

Many long distance couples refuse to leave each other until they have the next tripped planned out.

It makes it so much easier to know when you will see each other next to not having any idea of how long it could be.

8. Be honest with each other.

This is one (if not the most) important parts of a long distance relationship.

In any relationship, you need to be honest with each other but it is even more essential when you aren’t able to see what they are up to at all days.

Be honest about where you’re going that night, who you’re with, if something is annoying you, etc. The more honest you are, the stronger your relationship and trust with each other is.

9. Share your location with each other.

This might sound crazy to some, but sharing your location with each other is so much fun.

First of all, if you are doing the right things you should never be worried about your significant other seeing where you are.

I love sharing my location with my boyfriend and vice versa because than I can see what he is up too. Also, if he isn’t answering my texts or calls, I am able to tell if he is in class.

My boyfriend likes it because it allows him to see when I get home at night and if I get to where I am going safely.

10. Know each others schedules.

It is great to know what your significant other is up too during the day so you can know when they are busy or when they can talk.

Because my boyfriend and I are in college, we know each others class schedule and can decide the best time to talk to each other during the day.

It is also nice to just know what they are up too and where are they.

11. Send surprise gifts.

Sending surprise gifts is so much fun for both sides of the relationship!

The anticipation of knowing that you have a surprise coming to your partner and your partner being surprised is exciting for the relationship.

I like to send surprise gifts that coordinate with the holiday. For example, for Valentine’s day I sent my boyfriend an all red package. I included all red food, random red knick knacks, and red confetti.

I purchased most things from the Dollar Store so it was extremely inexpensive but my boyfriend loved it.

If your partner mentions something that they’ve been wanting, it’s always fun to also send that to them. It shows that you have been listening to their wants.

This is especially good if your love language is gifts (me!).

{RELATED POST: Long Distance Relationship Gift Ideas For Him}

12. How To Do Long Distance Relationships: Appreciate the repetition.

Long-distance relationships can become extremely repetitive.

You ask the same questions and usually receive the same answers. For my boyfriend and I, this was extremely hard the first year. It came to a point where we would literally repeat the same conversations over.

It is essential to change your mindset about this and enjoy the repetition. What else can you learn about their day? What did they eat for dinner? Who did they eat lunch with? What work did they do that day? How are they feeling? There are always more questions that can be asked!

13. Prioritize your schedules.

In a long distance relationship you need to think about your schedules and make it work with your goals for your relationship.

This is not possible for everyone, but because my boyfriend and I are in college I always try to make sure I don’t have classes on Friday so that I can spend a long weekend with him whenever I want.

Obviously in the working world, this is MUCH harder to do. But, you can think about when you both have a weekend open or to make time every day to talk to your partner.

14. Don’t talk too much.

Talking too much can make you not appreciate your life where you are. Of course, you wan’t to talk enough but their is a mark when it becomes too much.

This question relates to tip #2. If you are always talking, it doesn’t allow you to live your life and go do things with other people.

Also, it makes the conversations less meaningful because you have already talked about everything.

When my boyfriend and I talk too much, we often start going on our phones or watching shows and at that point we are not even talking anymore!

We have found the better conversations happen when we talk less (but still enough) during the day.

15. FaceTime each other.

While FaceTime doesn’t eliminate the distance between you two, it does make it SO much better.

You can see where they are living, what they are doing, and even what they are wearing.

The face to face contact makes it more personal and almost tricks your mind that you are together for a little.

16. Ask about your partner’s friends and family.

Staying connected with your partners life makes it feel like you are experiencing more with him and getting to know his life better.

Ask about his mom, his cousin that just had a baby, what his friends are doing this weekend, etc.

Your partner will appreciate that you are interested in their life and it will also let you in on more things about your partner.

17.How To Do Long Distance Relationships:Give them one of your personal objects.

If you are a sucker for “personal” objects, than this one is for you.

Having your significant others personal objects lets you smell and feel more connected to them.

This might make me sound weird, but when my boyfriend went to college he left his towel at home. The towel smelled JUST like him and I definitely carried it around me for awhile.

I know of a lot of girls who will keep one of their boyfriends shirts and wear it to bed.

18. Pick a “couple” song.

Having “your” song makes it so special when it randomly comes on the radio.

There are a ton of long distance playlists available on Spotify and so many of the songs are extremely relatable.

My current favorite right now is “Hey There Delilah” by the Plan White T’s. The words to that song hit so close to home and every time it comes on it makes me smile (and occasionally shed a tear).

19. Set rules to know what you are both expecting.

Setting rules about what you want and expect out of this relationship can make it more clear and lead to less arguments.

If you know that your significant other would like to talk at least once a day, you schedule your day to be able to talk to them.

If your boyfriend doesn’t feel comfortable with you hanging with one of your guy friends alone, than don’t.

Knowing what is expected from each side makes less unknowns which also equals less fights.

20. If someone is upset, TALK it out. Don’t text.

Texting is great for quick communication but if there is an issue, NEVER text. Seriously, don’t.

Texts can be read so differently than what they may have meant to say. It is very easy for you to add your own tone to texts whereas on the phone you can more accurately figure out what the person is trying to say to you.

It’s similar to the quote, “Don’t go to bed in a fight”. Whatever you do, “Don’t text in a fight”. Such things can exacerbate the squabble and might eventually lead to a breakup. All you’d be looking at would be quotes for broken hearts.

21. Have date nights (it’s still possible!).

couple having fun together

How can you have a date night thousands of miles away?! Well, it is possible and so fun.

Both of you can go get your favorite takeout. Head home and than FaceTime each other and eat your meal together. Once that is done, play one of your favorite TV shows or movies and watch it together.

It is not as ideal as being together but it still can be fun!

22. How To Do Long Distance Relationships: Stay positive.

It is extremely easy to be negative about everything when you just want to be with each other.

Let’s be honest though, being negative all the time is not fun for either of you and can be extremely draining.

Talk about how great it will be when you are done with your long distance or how excited you are to see each other next.

23. Focus on quality communication.

Because long distance relationships are not able to talk all the time, the time you can talk should be quality conversation.

These means don’t be on your phone, talking to someone else, doing work, and whatever else.

Really listen to the conversation and appreciate the time you get to talk.

My boyfriend has a habit of trying to do homework when I am talking to him. The second that he started giving me answers to questions that don’t make sense I know what he is up too and it drives me nuts. We now have a rule that no homework is allowed to happen when we are talking on the phone (and I am a much happier camper).

24. Don’t just live your life around your long distance relationship.

This may seem contradicting to tip #13 on this list but their needs to be a balance.

You can not just live your life surrounded around your long distance relationship.

An example of this for me is that I choose to not follow my boyfriend to college (and he choose to not follow me). We both knew that we wanted differen’t college experiences and that was important to us.

I knew I wouldn’t enjoy his school, and if I would have followed him their I could have regretted it my whole life.

However, because of this decision, I try to always make my schedule able to visit him.

It is always about finding that balance.