5 Must-Know Ways to Make Sure Your Long Distance Relationship Lasts

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My boyfriend and I live eight hours apart 75% of the year, and let me tell you, it is not easy.

However, being apart this much has taught us so much and ultimately brought our relationship closer than before. You know the saying, distance makes the heart grow fonder ;).

Ben (my boyfriend) and I have been together for almost four years now- we started dating in high school and would spend every waking minute together.

When it was time to make college decisions, it was known for awhile that he would be heading off to Iowa (he’s a college athlete). And, unfortunately, our colleges ended up being 5 hours away from each other.

 

Fast forward to this year and me transferring schools, we are now officially eight hours apart. Originally, I thought that this distance was devastating and didn’t know how I would survive being that far apart (cue the dramatics;) but honestly now, I think it is one of the best things to ever happen to our relationship.

So how exactly have we made it work so well?

First things first, we fully trust each other.

I have 100% trust in him that he would never cheat on me and for that matter in general… he sucks at lying/keeping things from me so I would be able to tell right away.

We both go to Christian colleges where partying is nothing like the big state schools, so I know we have that advantage since we don’t really have to worry about drunk mistakes but honestly, even if we did go to a big party school, we would be fine. Having trust in your relationship is soo important!!

We also communicate all-the-time.

We make it a priority to text each other first thing in the morning and last thing at night. We also have consistently facetimed each other every single day (a lot of the time multiple times per day) and talked about what we had going on, who we were hanging out with, homework that we have, etc.

(adding this in– we always figure out arguments before we get off the phone. I might take longer than that phone call to get over what I was frustrated about but we make sure to talk it out and end the phone call on a good note)

 

Okay, so that makes it look like all we do is talk to each other. BUT, this next thing I think is equally as important to communicating all the time– give them some space! Ben doesn’t get mad if I don’t respond to a text or if I say I am busy and can’t talk and vice-versa.

I am going to assume that since you are sticking it out through this long distance that you are planning on being with each other for forever, so enjoy your independence!!

I love being able to hang out with my girlfriends whenever I want and as selfish as it sounds, appreciate being completely on my own schedule while we are apart!

Ben plays college soccer which takes up a lot of time and doesn’t allow him to travel home (honestly, this is our biggest argument!!).

Even though I fight it a lot, I respect that he really only has two more years in his life left for this sport so he needs to truly enjoy it (and not have a nagging girlfriend annoy him about it hehe whoops).

I make sure I get up to visit him usually at least once a month and once I am there I love to hangout with his friends and do what he normally does so I feel connected in his life there (if that makes sense!).

And lastly, we surprise each other here and there with packages.

This may seem expensive and can definitely add up, but you can do this really inexpensive and have a huge impact on your boyfriend {READ: 19 DIY Gifts For Long Distance Relationships}. I have to say, Ben is much better at doing this than I am… Last year, he called me one night and told me to go check my mailbox. In it were a pair of Lululemon leggings I had really wanted!!

I have been reading up a little on love languages and know that the way I feel loved is by receiving gifts and love that he has figured that one out too ;). I also try to make sure that his love language is hit which is touch (cringing typing that for the internet to know but he is a boy sooo..haha) and that ones a little harder being apart….ladies, get creative ;). <—- hate myself haha!

I am not going to sugar coat long distance relationships and say that it is easy, because it is not at all and I am counting down the days until Ben never has to leave me again but I do believe that if you put a little effort into keeping the relationship “alive”, you can make it through the distance.

Like I said earlier, different personalities are going to change the way you handle situations. It might make it easier and it might make it harder but if you see yourself marrying this person you should be willing to do just about anything to make it last (anything legal of course ;).

And lastly, your long distance wont last for forever!! It might seem like it is forever, but in twenty years you will look back and think about how little that time spent apart feels.

What is the number one way you keep your long-distance relationship strong?

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